the law of attraction

by The Dreamer

i’ve been reading self-help books lately, especially after the mad exam rush that left me particularly disillusioned and broken, and one point that caught my eye was ‘the law of attraction’.

the universe sends you back whatever you send to the universe, like an echo.

maybe it’s me being groundlessly hopeful, but i’m going to try it out, see how it works out on my mental state and how it affects my social surroundings and outcomes as well. it definitely makes sense, in a way – negativity begets negativity, kindness begets kindness.

i think conscious efforts are the most important. the book also asserted that one shouldn’t repress negative thoughts. instead, simply let positivity overcrowd the negative thoughts, like wildflowers overgrowing instead of weeds.

someone that i admire and respect dearly also voiced out a story which really stoked embers within me as well. “people have their own rights to hate you or not. why are you trying to control that? you have no rights to take away their rights to hate you. it’s their own opinion and you can’t do anything about it. but you can choose not to get hurt or be affected by it. that’s your own opinion and your own rights.”

in this long weekend, i’ve been writing, and god, does it feel so painfully good. but the satisfaction lasts momentarily, before insecurities set in again, often the case when you put your ideas and creative products out there to the market to critique, and competition is now factored into your passion, which can sometimes really dampen motivation. i’m also mindlessly upset about the sheer amount of time and effort i take to churn out maybe 5000 words (i take around a day, with painstaking research and constant revisions, taking many roadstops along the way because i’m just so drained), and then there are people who write beautiful 5000 word-long stories in the span of their 40 minute bus ride, confidently uploading it and the amount of perfection in the final product (often their first draft) immediately garners so much attention and love.

it’s disheartening, yes, but i’ve always taken the toughest route, so what’s new, really?

钧 x x

j e a n x x

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